My proposal to save Anglicanism

For over 10 years, I have been ruminating over how Anglicanism might be saved. For I love it, and desperately want it to be saved. And now, emerging over the dim eastern horizon, I see Anglicanism's temporal rescuer, the thing that will save it, rejoicing like a champion to run its race: Marketing.

Now I generally hate Marketing as much as the next guy, but hear me out. For something like 7 or 8 years I have been running a money-losing business called Anglican Beach Party. It is not much of a business. But enough of a business that I get voluminous amounts of mail (chiefly Credit Card offers) addressed to me care of Anglican Beach Party.

Or, actually not exactly addressed that way. What began as a small trickle of envelopes addressed to Angelican Beach Party is now a torrent: 95% of my mail now says Angelican rather than Anglican.

I used to get angry ... but then it hit me ... why not rename all that is good and truly Anglican to be called Angelican?! We would be the church of St. Michael, St. Raphael, St. Uriel ... and, putting my Marketing cap on again ... Angels currently exhibit much better brand strength than England.

I always had wondered if the "Anglican" name had been holding us back, particularly among Hispanics, for whom it would be a work of supererogation to join an Anglo- anything? For to be tied to England, and especially in a day when the Archbishop of Canterbury talks of sharia law being enforced there, is a bad thing. But everyone loves angels. Even Credit Card companies.

Join the Worldwide Angelican Communion ... today!